[ Friend seek comfort in touch, and Xenk is no different. For all his eccentricities, he enjoys the warmth of another. Perhaps it is his undying nature that draws him so to another's warmth. Or perhaps 100+ years of traveling the land has made him more cognizant and appreciative of what physical touch he can claim. ]
Of course. It is an honor to be found worthy of his blessing. My Oath is the holy fire on which my magic is forged. I wear my devotion proudly. It rallies to others the clear proof of my intent.
[ Xenk, after all, finds nothing strange about his Oath. They are as common to him as the rising of the sun and the breeze on the wind. And tells everyone around him that he's a stick in the mud, basically!! I mean, sure, it can feel like a leash at times but those times are so rare, Xenk wouldn't want to bother Fenris with them. ]
I apologize, I find at times that I can be quite verbose when explaining topics of which I am particularly knowledgeable of. I did not intend for our discussion to stray from the matter at hand.
[ That is, the topic of his letter, and the writing besides.... ]
My letter, and the invitation therein. I am honored to have your assistance, and, if it would not be too bold, would--
[ He squeezes Fenris' hand gently. He doesn't need to be so proper with Fenris, at least not all the time, does he? They're friends. ]
Would you like me to help you, with learning to read and write? I would not presume over your wants or needs, but I find the practice of writing letters to be quite enjoyable.
[Not only was it a willing oath, but it was something he found honour in. He can understand the way it would make him a beacon of good, that other's could see clearly and trust, but did that not just--
No. Maybe Fenris needed more information about this, needed to better understand. He did not want to offend his friend by questioning him so directly, especially about something he feels such value for - he knows that if his own values were questioned he would grow defensive and irritated. And while he does not see that happening with Xenk, he also did not want his friend to feel disregarded for his values.
He would think on it and perhaps go to Astarion about it. Try to gain an understanding from someone with an outside perspective.]
There is nothing to apologize for, I wish to fully understand your oath and what it means to you. I do appreciate your verbose candor.
[He did appreciate it, he asked and is glad that Xenk thought to share it all with him gladly. Many might have seen to say less and confuse him more. He wants to understand, it's why he's struggling to.
The squeeze to his hand and the offer take him by surprise, his eyebrows going up for a second, but soon they settle and a warmth spreads to Fenris' ears. He had asked Daria for some help in this area, in getting him books so he could learn, but to be offered to be taught?
It's been a while, since Hawke, but he finds himself nodding at the unexpected kindness. It was almost too much.]
If it isn't much trouble I would be grateful to learn. Letter writing seems to be a staple here and.. [He feels lost on that aspect] An acquaintance has helped me acquire books to help me learn but I find myself... still struggling on my own.
[A pause, then he squeezes the man's hand back.] If you wish to assist me, I would insist to repay you for this kindness.
[ Xenk nods, smiling at Fenris' acceptance and understanding. He has not met many who appreciate just how wordy he can get. Xenk is well-aware that it is annoying for some, so he is happy to hear Fenris is not among that number. ]
It must seem strange, to those from a different world.
[ Especially one like Fenris', where the gods have gone missing or are said to not exist. Yes, surely this is the part that's weird. Well, anyway.
The real matter at hand is Xenk's offer. It's been many, many years since Xenk learned his letters, but he's ventured high and low across the land, and taught and learned more languages than just Common. ]
It would be no trouble at all. It would be an honor, in fact. And an excellent reason to travel Nogard, which I am ever happy to visit.
[ So many of his friends are there!! But Xenk almost smirks at Fenris' insistence of repayment. He twines their fingers together because he finds that offer extremely endearing. ]
Having heard my Oath, you know that no such repayment would be necessary. You are my friend, Fenris. My offer is without any expectation.
I admit yes, it seems strange, especially considering religion is very different from your world and mine.
[But he doesn't linger long on that, instead moving on from it rather readily, because he has to think on it and what discomforts him about this Oath, how it feels indentured to him. Yet he knows it is likely a difference in worlds, a lack of understanding between them, because Xenk does not act indentured or pressed upon by his god. Not like Fenris would think he would if it was any different.
Still, that was something to think on, perhaps discuss with Astarion.
He can't stop himself from the small curl of lips into a smile as he feels the man twine their fingers together, giving them a squeeze when it's done. The refusal of repayment is not surprising in the least, but he still finds it in himself to want to repay the other man for this, not wanting to be in his debt. Even if he knows Xenk would never call on that debt.]
Then I shall have to think of a way to repay you by a means of which you cannot refuse.
[He knows that Xenk does not need to eat, he gathered that much from their time together, but perhaps he can figure out what he likes to indulge in and Fenris will make it.]
If there is something you particularly enjoy indulging in, I would be glad to provide it during our lessons together.
With the absent gods your world, it must be different indeed.
[ But Xenk values differences, and finds Fenris' worries to be endearing more than anything. Just as Fenris insists on repayment, it's just another thing that proves his kindness, and Xenk could never fault him for being a kind, honest person. ]
It is not often I indulge.
[ But he says this lightly, more an inside joke for himself than anything. The truth is of course that he indulges quite a bit. He does not need to eat, but he does. He does not drink to excess, but he still imbibes. Well, and now he has a pet cat. Little things that he justifies as being part of the "human" experience. He would not deprive himself of them, nor concern others with his lack of need.
And he can't exactly ask to be paid in kisses or something like that, unless Fenris offered it first... ]
I shall need to think of something, as it is not my intent to make you indebted to me.
[ Ah, but the letters might be the answer. Xenk does enjoy proper ink and parchment. Who can say, really... ]
[Fenris wouldn't call himself a kind person, not with his track record. He is honest though.
The light way that Xenk says it, it makes him wonder what the joke it, though he doesn't ask. He's often not privy to many jokes, not that it doesn't bother him. His own jokes often fly over some heads because he says them so seriously, his dry sarcasm often not sounding any different from anything else he says.
It does occur to him, he knows that Xenk is a type of undead too, much like Astarion... perhaps--]
Xenk, you mentioned before that you are.. partially undead, yes? [He lowers his voice very carefully, making sure this is truly between the two of them alone.]
Are you also sustained by consuming blood? I do not mind offering my own if so.
[He would warn the man of the affects and a part of him wonders if Astarion might not want to share that aspect with another, but he will cross those bridges when the time comes.]
[ Xenk nods, unsure of where Fenris is going with his question. Then he speaks his offer and.
Xenk needs a moment to. Hear all those words and put them in an order that makes sense. His smile remains, though his head tilts to the side in confusion. He blinks, the gears in his head clearly turning.
Fenris would not offer something he didn't mean. And he clearly means what he's offering, which gives Xenk pause... oh, it's because he's so close with Astarion, isn't it? This would explain much. Xenk hasn't inquired as to Astarion's blood supply since the first time they discussed it, but he knows that he must be feeding from some of the Corsairs, if it hasn't been a problem again. ]
I am flattered by your generous offer, Fenris.
[ And he is! It's a very big deal to offer one's lifeblood as payment. It isn't something Xenk would take unless he truly had to, but it's deeply flattering. ]
However, I am able to ingest mortal food, and do not consume blood as our mutual friend does.
[ He still doesn't say his name because he's that serious about his secret. ]
[Ah, so it seems then that Xenk knows about Astarion, perhaps because it was hardly something Astarion thought to tell Fenris to keep it a secret, but he finds himself unsurprised. The two seem close, at least enough to be inviting him to the crew as well. He wouldn't be surprised if they were sleeping together as well, though he doesn't assume as much, he just knows well enough not to assume he is their only bed companion.
Nor is he bothered by it.]
Ah, I see.. [There was some embarrassment.] I was unsure how undead in your world work, as they are but mindless husks or spirits in mine.
[All but the one, that was Hawke's mother, but he tries not to remember that abomination of pain and suffering that was nothing like his friends here. Another instance of terrible magic and the horrible ways it can be used...]
Then I shall make you what Thedas dishes I know as repayment initially, at least until such time that I can figure out a better method.
[ As fellow undead, they have much in common. But Xenk has sworn secrecy regarding Astarion's curse, which is a great sacrifice indeed when one has taken an oath of honesty.
Still, he could not possibly fault Fenris for not knowing the finer details between different kinds of undead. ]
You have nothing to compare to, I understand. In our case, the distinction is thus: a vampire must consume blood, while I am closer to what is called a zombie; a reanimated corpse. Though my condition is only partial, thus my body continues to operate as it should—I have a heartbeat, though it is slow, and do not specifically require food, though I am capable of consuming it.
[ He says these things so easily, like he's explaining how the grass grows or the sun shines. But Xenk still hopes his words don't put off Fenris—for all that he is blunt and honest, he's like this because he feels it's what his friends are owed. He squeezes his hand in return, smiling softly. ]
I shall look forward to it, then. I am ever happy to discover new things, and food is an excellent means with which to experience other cultures.
[Its a little off-putting, but it doesn't deter him from the other man, still holding his hand as if nothing has changed. He better understands now, but still finds the idea of his two closest friends here being undead a little uncomfortable. Perhaps because he doesn't fully understand how they can be so alive while also being dead, that the only time he saw an undead slightly life like that was undead was Hawke's mother..
Still, he cannot fault Astarion for his need for blood to survive or Xenk's lack of need for food. He's not about to change how he feels about his friends due to some very mild discomfort over something that was out of their control. This is just how they were, however that was. It was just another part of another world that didn't translate purely over to his own.
Honestly, it was just easier to not think of them as undead at all but as Astarion and Xenk without worrying about the details.
He gives a nod. Before he steps forward and gives Xenk a kiss.]
Then it would be my pleasure to cook what I know, though I do not know many recipes. Will have to think of something better for when I exercise the limit of my cooking knowledge.
[ That's the spirit, Fenris. Honestly, Xenk would at times prefer people did not think of him as undead, but since arriving here he's found that most people are understanding, so it's easier to simply be himself. It helps that he's got Astarion, who understands more than most can, but they still have different 'conditions' so it simply is what it is. Where Astarion has been in stasis for two centuries, Xenk has had his life slow to a crawl.
But being around friends, and loves besides, does help him feel alive in ways he hadn't thought he'd get to enjoy. So when that kiss from Fenris comes, he's both surprised and deeply grateful. He knows just how lucky he is to have a friend like him. Helping him with his literacy would be his pleasure, if only to show Fenris just how much he means to him. ]
Know that anything made by your hand would be the finest ambrosia for me, Fenris.
[ He moves his arm to wrap around Fenris' waist, leaning down to return the kiss in kind. ]
You are much too kind, and I would be fortunate indeed to have earned such care.
He feels... not blessed, but of that nature to know Xenk, to have had this chance to meet the man and get to know him. To care about him. He was a good friend and ally, something Fenris hasn't had much of in his life and for that he's grateful. And it explains why he might be concerned for the man, even if he does not express it.
He hopes the kiss conveys as much, if not, he's never been one to have trouble voicing his feelings at least. ]
You flatter me, but I did not work in the kitchens, if it's unbearable, please spit it out. [He means it, he doesn't have to worry about killing Xenk with his cooking really, but he knows it likely won't be fantastic.]
You are the one doing me a great kindness.. the shellphones help, but I find myself often at a disadvantage here without the skill to read.
You underestimate my ability to stomach even the strangest of foods. I have traveled Faerun for over a century, I mean this seriously -- you cannot make anything that would offend my tastebuds. Unless it happens to be entirely uncooked.
[ He's had that happen before! But also he seems happy to have Fenris' care and his counsel. Unfortunately, once you get closer to Xenk, his awful sense of humor starts to come out. He says things like this and then he's back to being serious. (He's always serious, just sometimes it's on purpose.) ]
Of course. It is a valuable skill, and one that many often take for granted. [ Reading and writing, even in Faerun, was not a given. ] When I first fled from Thay in my youth, I knew only how to read and write in Thayan script. The common language was known to me, but putting it to paper took some time. And it was not until years later that I learned the proper rules of grammar and recitation. I will ensure it does not take you years to master this.
Just because I can't kill you with my cooking does not mean you must bear it if it's unpalatable. [Fenris laughs, but he is glad to know that Xenk will not be opposed to pig oat mash since that is on the list of things he can make.
It wasn't a long list.
Still it was a list he was willing to explore to cook for the other man.
He follows the joke and back into seriousness rather easily at least, both used to it from Xenk and his own ability to go from sarcasm to joking with great ease. There was a reason it often took his friends back home a little bit of time to usually figure out if he was joking or not.]
Yes, I know that at least I have the vocabulary, if I can learn to associate the arranged letters to the word, it should be easy enough, but learning to read has been.. a difficult endeavor. One I was trying to learn with Hawke when I was back home.
But thank you. I will do my best to be a good student.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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Of course. It is an honor to be found worthy of his blessing. My Oath is the holy fire on which my magic is forged. I wear my devotion proudly. It rallies to others the clear proof of my intent.
[ Xenk, after all, finds nothing strange about his Oath. They are as common to him as the rising of the sun and the breeze on the wind. And tells everyone around him that he's a stick in the mud, basically!! I mean, sure, it can feel like a leash at times but those times are so rare, Xenk wouldn't want to bother Fenris with them. ]
I apologize, I find at times that I can be quite verbose when explaining topics of which I am particularly knowledgeable of. I did not intend for our discussion to stray from the matter at hand.
[ That is, the topic of his letter, and the writing besides.... ]
My letter, and the invitation therein. I am honored to have your assistance, and, if it would not be too bold, would--
[ He squeezes Fenris' hand gently. He doesn't need to be so proper with Fenris, at least not all the time, does he? They're friends. ]
Would you like me to help you, with learning to read and write? I would not presume over your wants or needs, but I find the practice of writing letters to be quite enjoyable.
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No. Maybe Fenris needed more information about this, needed to better understand. He did not want to offend his friend by questioning him so directly, especially about something he feels such value for - he knows that if his own values were questioned he would grow defensive and irritated. And while he does not see that happening with Xenk, he also did not want his friend to feel disregarded for his values.
He would think on it and perhaps go to Astarion about it. Try to gain an understanding from someone with an outside perspective.]
There is nothing to apologize for, I wish to fully understand your oath and what it means to you. I do appreciate your verbose candor.
[He did appreciate it, he asked and is glad that Xenk thought to share it all with him gladly. Many might have seen to say less and confuse him more. He wants to understand, it's why he's struggling to.
The squeeze to his hand and the offer take him by surprise, his eyebrows going up for a second, but soon they settle and a warmth spreads to Fenris' ears. He had asked Daria for some help in this area, in getting him books so he could learn, but to be offered to be taught?
It's been a while, since Hawke, but he finds himself nodding at the unexpected kindness. It was almost too much.]
If it isn't much trouble I would be grateful to learn. Letter writing seems to be a staple here and.. [He feels lost on that aspect] An acquaintance has helped me acquire books to help me learn but I find myself... still struggling on my own.
[A pause, then he squeezes the man's hand back.] If you wish to assist me, I would insist to repay you for this kindness.
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It must seem strange, to those from a different world.
[ Especially one like Fenris', where the gods have gone missing or are said to not exist. Yes, surely this is the part that's weird. Well, anyway.
The real matter at hand is Xenk's offer. It's been many, many years since Xenk learned his letters, but he's ventured high and low across the land, and taught and learned more languages than just Common. ]
It would be no trouble at all. It would be an honor, in fact. And an excellent reason to travel Nogard, which I am ever happy to visit.
[ So many of his friends are there!! But Xenk almost smirks at Fenris' insistence of repayment. He twines their fingers together because he finds that offer extremely endearing. ]
Having heard my Oath, you know that no such repayment would be necessary. You are my friend, Fenris. My offer is without any expectation.
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[But he doesn't linger long on that, instead moving on from it rather readily, because he has to think on it and what discomforts him about this Oath, how it feels indentured to him. Yet he knows it is likely a difference in worlds, a lack of understanding between them, because Xenk does not act indentured or pressed upon by his god. Not like Fenris would think he would if it was any different.
Still, that was something to think on, perhaps discuss with Astarion.
He can't stop himself from the small curl of lips into a smile as he feels the man twine their fingers together, giving them a squeeze when it's done. The refusal of repayment is not surprising in the least, but he still finds it in himself to want to repay the other man for this, not wanting to be in his debt. Even if he knows Xenk would never call on that debt.]
Then I shall have to think of a way to repay you by a means of which you cannot refuse.
[He knows that Xenk does not need to eat, he gathered that much from their time together, but perhaps he can figure out what he likes to indulge in and Fenris will make it.]
If there is something you particularly enjoy indulging in, I would be glad to provide it during our lessons together.
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[ But Xenk values differences, and finds Fenris' worries to be endearing more than anything. Just as Fenris insists on repayment, it's just another thing that proves his kindness, and Xenk could never fault him for being a kind, honest person. ]
It is not often I indulge.
[ But he says this lightly, more an inside joke for himself than anything. The truth is of course that he indulges quite a bit. He does not need to eat, but he does. He does not drink to excess, but he still imbibes. Well, and now he has a pet cat. Little things that he justifies as being part of the "human" experience. He would not deprive himself of them, nor concern others with his lack of need.
And he can't exactly ask to be paid in kisses or something like that, unless Fenris offered it first... ]
I shall need to think of something, as it is not my intent to make you indebted to me.
[ Ah, but the letters might be the answer. Xenk does enjoy proper ink and parchment. Who can say, really... ]
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The light way that Xenk says it, it makes him wonder what the joke it, though he doesn't ask. He's often not privy to many jokes, not that it doesn't bother him. His own jokes often fly over some heads because he says them so seriously, his dry sarcasm often not sounding any different from anything else he says.
It does occur to him, he knows that Xenk is a type of undead too, much like Astarion... perhaps--]
Xenk, you mentioned before that you are.. partially undead, yes? [He lowers his voice very carefully, making sure this is truly between the two of them alone.]
Are you also sustained by consuming blood? I do not mind offering my own if so.
[He would warn the man of the affects and a part of him wonders if Astarion might not want to share that aspect with another, but he will cross those bridges when the time comes.]
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Xenk needs a moment to. Hear all those words and put them in an order that makes sense. His smile remains, though his head tilts to the side in confusion. He blinks, the gears in his head clearly turning.
Fenris would not offer something he didn't mean. And he clearly means what he's offering, which gives Xenk pause... oh, it's because he's so close with Astarion, isn't it? This would explain much. Xenk hasn't inquired as to Astarion's blood supply since the first time they discussed it, but he knows that he must be feeding from some of the Corsairs, if it hasn't been a problem again. ]
I am flattered by your generous offer, Fenris.
[ And he is! It's a very big deal to offer one's lifeblood as payment. It isn't something Xenk would take unless he truly had to, but it's deeply flattering. ]
However, I am able to ingest mortal food, and do not consume blood as our mutual friend does.
[ He still doesn't say his name because he's that serious about his secret. ]
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Nor is he bothered by it.]
Ah, I see.. [There was some embarrassment.] I was unsure how undead in your world work, as they are but mindless husks or spirits in mine.
[All but the one, that was Hawke's mother, but he tries not to remember that abomination of pain and suffering that was nothing like his friends here. Another instance of terrible magic and the horrible ways it can be used...]
Then I shall make you what Thedas dishes I know as repayment initially, at least until such time that I can figure out a better method.
[He gives the other man's hand a squeeze.]
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Still, he could not possibly fault Fenris for not knowing the finer details between different kinds of undead. ]
You have nothing to compare to, I understand. In our case, the distinction is thus: a vampire must consume blood, while I am closer to what is called a zombie; a reanimated corpse. Though my condition is only partial, thus my body continues to operate as it should—I have a heartbeat, though it is slow, and do not specifically require food, though I am capable of consuming it.
[ He says these things so easily, like he's explaining how the grass grows or the sun shines. But Xenk still hopes his words don't put off Fenris—for all that he is blunt and honest, he's like this because he feels it's what his friends are owed. He squeezes his hand in return, smiling softly. ]
I shall look forward to it, then. I am ever happy to discover new things, and food is an excellent means with which to experience other cultures.
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Still, he cannot fault Astarion for his need for blood to survive or Xenk's lack of need for food. He's not about to change how he feels about his friends due to some very mild discomfort over something that was out of their control. This is just how they were, however that was. It was just another part of another world that didn't translate purely over to his own.
Honestly, it was just easier to not think of them as undead at all but as Astarion and Xenk without worrying about the details.
He gives a nod. Before he steps forward and gives Xenk a kiss.]
Then it would be my pleasure to cook what I know, though I do not know many recipes. Will have to think of something better for when I exercise the limit of my cooking knowledge.
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But being around friends, and loves besides, does help him feel alive in ways he hadn't thought he'd get to enjoy. So when that kiss from Fenris comes, he's both surprised and deeply grateful. He knows just how lucky he is to have a friend like him. Helping him with his literacy would be his pleasure, if only to show Fenris just how much he means to him. ]
Know that anything made by your hand would be the finest ambrosia for me, Fenris.
[ He moves his arm to wrap around Fenris' waist, leaning down to return the kiss in kind. ]
You are much too kind, and I would be fortunate indeed to have earned such care.
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He feels... not blessed, but of that nature to know Xenk, to have had this chance to meet the man and get to know him. To care about him. He was a good friend and ally, something Fenris hasn't had much of in his life and for that he's grateful. And it explains why he might be concerned for the man, even if he does not express it.
He hopes the kiss conveys as much, if not, he's never been one to have trouble voicing his feelings at least. ]
You flatter me, but I did not work in the kitchens, if it's unbearable, please spit it out. [He means it, he doesn't have to worry about killing Xenk with his cooking really, but he knows it likely won't be fantastic.]
You are the one doing me a great kindness.. the shellphones help, but I find myself often at a disadvantage here without the skill to read.
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You underestimate my ability to stomach even the strangest of foods. I have traveled Faerun for over a century, I mean this seriously -- you cannot make anything that would offend my tastebuds. Unless it happens to be entirely uncooked.
[ He's had that happen before! But also he seems happy to have Fenris' care and his counsel. Unfortunately, once you get closer to Xenk, his awful sense of humor starts to come out. He says things like this and then he's back to being serious. (He's always serious, just sometimes it's on purpose.) ]
Of course. It is a valuable skill, and one that many often take for granted. [ Reading and writing, even in Faerun, was not a given. ] When I first fled from Thay in my youth, I knew only how to read and write in Thayan script. The common language was known to me, but putting it to paper took some time. And it was not until years later that I learned the proper rules of grammar and recitation. I will ensure it does not take you years to master this.
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It wasn't a long list.
Still it was a list he was willing to explore to cook for the other man.
He follows the joke and back into seriousness rather easily at least, both used to it from Xenk and his own ability to go from sarcasm to joking with great ease. There was a reason it often took his friends back home a little bit of time to usually figure out if he was joking or not.]
Yes, I know that at least I have the vocabulary, if I can learn to associate the arranged letters to the word, it should be easy enough, but learning to read has been.. a difficult endeavor. One I was trying to learn with Hawke when I was back home.
But thank you. I will do my best to be a good student.